I Was Here - Gayle Forman

Goodreads summary:

Cody and Meg were inseparable.
Two peas in a pod.
Until . . . they weren’t anymore.

When her best friend Meg drinks a bottle of industrial-strength cleaner alone in a motel room, Cody is understandably shocked and devastated. She and Meg shared everything—so how was there no warning? But when Cody travels to Meg’s college town to pack up the belongings left behind, she discovers that there’s a lot that Meg never told her. About her old roommates, the sort of people Cody never would have met in her dead-end small town in Washington. About Ben McAllister, the boy with a guitar and a sneer, who broke Meg’s heart. And about an encrypted computer file that Cody can’t open—until she does, and suddenly everything Cody thought she knew about her best friend’s death gets thrown into question.

I Was Here is Gayle Forman at her finest, a taut, emotional, and ultimately redemptive story about redefining the meaning of family and finding a way to move forward even in the face of unspeakable loss.


My review:

4.5/5

So, so, so, so good!!

While I didn't really like If I Stay, I Was Here hit me hard. It made me experience such a wide variety of emotions that I didn't even know I could feel and I loved it.

I loved Cody, the main character. Unlike Mia, who I couldn't really relate to in If I Stay, Cody was a very relatable character for me. I could feel some of her anger, guilt and grief and it made the story much more important to me. Since I have a best friend that I can't imagine living without, having lived most of my life with her by my side, I could imagine a tiny bit of what Cody must feel after her best friend committed suicide, which sounds simply terrible. Her reactions are completely understandable to me, even if I didn't approve all of them. I liked how realistic and not totally likeable she could be, which made me like her even more.

Her friendship with Meg is also very realistic, from the beginning to the end. I could see why they became friends and why they fell apart, which is something that happens often when friends grow up. I'm already terrified to go through something like that with my own best friend, so reading about someone who grew apart from her best friend and then lost her forever scared me even more. It's easy to see why Cody would feel so guilty after Meg's suicide and why she would want to find out what pushed her to do it, but I admired her determination through her quest. Cody's relationship with Meg's parents is a part of the book that I loved, because it's heartbreaking and touching.

Finally, Ben and Cody's relationship was a rollercoaster, but I loved it. I wasn't sure if I approved of Cody's actions, but as the story progressed, I could see things falling into place.

I definitely recommend this book. Whether you liked If I Stay or not, I think you would like this book.