mercredi 30 septembre 2015

Dear September

Dear September,

You were quite a bittersweet month. Mostly sweet, but there was a bitterness that I just couldn't shake off, especially as the days grew colder.

I'm thankful for the sweet moments, though. They were the highlight of my month and surprisingly numerous. I enjoyed my cozy nights with friends and family, or simply by my own, with soft music playing in the background and a nice candle burning. I spent so much quality time this month that I felt like if I were to die at any point during this month, I would've had a perfectly happy life. Knowing this only made me want to go on in life even more, so I gained an energy that kept me going in the darkest times.

Hearing the rain pour while I was reading in bed made me feel happy and safe, which is always the case with autumnal days. Whenever I got a little bit of fall depression, I just picked up a nice romance novel, which cheered me up instantly. I was guilty of doing that a lot, in the last thirty-something days. However, I read over ten books in a month, while dealing with college, which I'm pretty proud of. In the end, you were a great month, reading-wise.

You were an awesome month for music. All four of the concerts I attended this month were amazing, leaving me with an exhausted yet giddy feeling. They came with a bit of nostalgia, knowing I would never experience the same exact feeling again, but they were absolutely worth it. My days were lulled by music and I found myself daydreaming about those dimly-lit rooms full of people who shared my passion. Incredibly, I got to meet my favourite band when they were performing at a music festival, something I will never forget. It's a completely different thing to listen to music all alone in your room than to hear it performed in front of you, but meeting the people who created it and talk to them brings you to cloud nine. I feel so blessed.

As I said before, there were more bitter moments, or days. You brought back the date marking the loss of someone I loved, but you also brought back the sadness and the overwhelmed feelings I felt only a year ago. Knowing it had been a year since I last saw this special someone, I couldn't help but break inside. I was fortunately able to find comfort in knowing that one day, maybe, I would think about the happier moments instead of my loss. I also got scared of losing someone else, which made me feel abandonned for as long as this fear lasted. I'm hoping that October will convince me that it was all just a fear, nothing serious.

Dear September, thank you for leaving me happy and hopeful, excited to see what October holds for me. 

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